The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly. —Jim Rohn
When did Leadership Find You?
I have never thought about this or verbalized this into words. Leadership has been all around me but I avoided it, or so I thought. I tried to fight, plead and argue my way out of being in leadership positions but it found me. I have been a volleyball coach, track coach, sorority vice president in my chapter, chair of events, department chair, mentor, mom, wife, coordinator and more. I never realized this until I was asked when did leadership find me. Others saw it in me but I denied it every single time. As I stated in my welcome page I am naturally an introvert. I know what I know and I like working alone to get something done. I can critique my work and reevaluate my weaknesses and learn from them. We were asked when leadership found us during a district meeting. At first I was speechless and before I even answered a friend said “you have always been a leader Tasha’. When she said that I thought about each time I tried to block my leadership roles. I also thought about the qualities that I have that I have not tapped into.
I have been approached to take on projects and turned them down….but those projects came back and found me. I never realized that other people saw the leader in me before I saw it in myself. I have the ability to lead others and follow when needed. My vision of a leader my not be the same as yours. I do not have to be the loudest in the bunch to be a leader. Nor do I have to be the flashiest one that controls others. I try to lead by example…I have worked on this over the years. I have RBF LOL (which most think of as me being a b-) and I understand that coaching people is more important than dictating. Leadership is seen by others in many ways……
Leadership is not for everyone…..
While everyone thinks they have leadership qualities, that is not always the case. To lead a team of people one should direct with character and respectful tact. One should also have some type of love for the position in which they want to lead. For example, I would never try to lead a team of architects to build an office building. That is clearly out of my area of influence….I can offer some of my leadership skills but that will not lead to building an office building. But if I was taught those skills on how to build and combine them with my leadership skills I would be a force to reckon with. Which means I would have to first be a follower and learn those skills.
Once you have the skills needed to successfully lead a team you are closer to effective leadership. If one lacks the social aspect and respect of others as leader NO ONE will want to follow them. Unless you are an contractor, a leader should not bully their team with a bullhorn. Toxic leadership leads to a team of people jumping ship.
Toxic leadership breeds a negative chain reaction in corporations, non-profits, government, educational and religious institutions. You might ask WHY toxic leadership is tolerated and even reinforced.
“Toxic Leadership and Bully Bosses.” Innolect Inc. N.p., n.d. Web. 21 Jan. 2017.
A “leader” leading a team of other leaders can be difficult, especially if you have toxic tendencies. Qualities of a leader are different than a dictator. I myself do not work well with dictators or those that want to bully people to do a task. If there is situation that frustrates a team of people a leader will find a way to respectfully calm the storm and come up with a solution. Or they tend to try to fix it themselves. Its funny how some people feel the need to break out the soapbox and SCREAM at the top of their lungs. Screaming and demanding in such a way that makes a crowd of people pissed to no end will not make anything better. Take time out and put your personal feelings to the side and think it through. When a person of power is pissed or upset they channel that energy and come up with a plan. Others tend to ruffle feathers and dictate or demand things out of emotions so that they look good in the end.
I want to be empowered, not be embarrassed. C. Alade
An intelligent, leader on a team working day and night should not feel embarrassed by her boss. Leaders share a few qualities that make them who they are; the art of making people feel embarrassed is not one of them. What makes someone a good leader? Do leaders lead by bullying people or being rude? I would like to say that a leader does not want to embarrass others. Leader qualities that found online are:
Being rude was not listed. Being rude is something a person does because of emotions they have towards someone or something. Each of us have qualities of a leader.
Take time out to find out what skills you have that make you a leader. It’s easy to say that you can follow someone and leading is not for you. That to me is fear speaking. Fear is something that we are not born to have. Fear comes from doubt and lack of faith. We all have the ability to lead someone…a team, a child, animals, a household, etc. To lead does not mean that you are going to be a CEO, it means that you are empowering others and not embarrassing them.